I might have to pick up Leona Lewis' new CD. Or steal it. Her new song is hitting my situation right on the head. Making me feel better about it to. I'll have to put it up if I can ever remember my username and password.. lol as well as the website to where I got my song playlist from. Can't believe I forgot that shit.
Lol this show Somebodies is funny. I'm over here rollin at this ghetto stupid shit. I don't even know the point of the show. Its just entertaining. Its about... nothing. Its so hot in my house right now. I feel like a fuckin' Zombie walkin' in the heat on Resident Evil 2 or 3. Its like.. LAWD... KILL ME NOWWWW!!! I'm finna go turn on the A/C when I get ready to go to sleep.
Okay... so the interview with Citi is on WEDNESDAY at 6PM. I'm so nervous... I know i'm not gonna choke up though. I'm just gonna keep a smile on my face & try not to stutter from nervousness. Lol feel like I need a cigarette or somethin. Ahh man. My biggest motivation now is Charlie's txt message. I saved it & when I start thinkin bout fuckin it up I just read it & get my mind right. You know, sometimes simple things like that mean the most. I'm pretty sure tomorrow or next week ill be writing a blog talkin' about fuck charlie lol!!! Thats just how we do I guess. He be makin me mad. But we good now so on to other things....
You know.. I was kinda hurt when I gave Darrius his walking papers that he didn't really give a fuck. Well I thought he didn't. But he txted me today & just said I hope we can work through this. whatever we goin through one day. But just forgive a nigga for what I took you through. It made me feel better to know that i'm not the only one hurting. Man I been losing sleep... I cried myself to sleep the first night I did it. But like the song say, even though I really love you, & it really hurts too, it'll all get better in time! or some bullshit like that. I bought the ringtone lol.
Ahhh man. Parris is driving me nuts. You know I almost did what I usually do and just let him back in my life. But I mean it this time & i'm really going to stick to it. And today he made it that much easier. I brought up to him how he didn't even give me so much as an invite to the girls birthday party or even tell me they were having one.. I found out from someone else. You know what the fuck this bitch said? 'Be forreal.. why i'mma bring a girl I had sex wit all in my baby ma face?!' HOW BOUT THIS NIGGA.. FUCK YOU AND YA BABY MAMA. Go fuck that bitch & leave me the fuck alone!! But tells me i'm not acting like a best friend... man he can kiss my ass... and even though i'm hurting now and my feelings is all dirty from being dragged through the dirt... i'mma get better ... and when i'm doin good i'ma walk past that nigga like i'm the baddest thing walking & act like I never heard of a motherfuckin' Parris. Shit i'mma always be good, because I always got me!
Anyways.. yeah so theres this dude named Black.. & he's really cool. I dont wanna be in a relationship right now cause i'm still hurting.. but i dont mind having a friend. & he's a sweetheart... well to me anyways. He's 6'4" lol. i'm 5'4". He's calling me right now!!! Lol...anyways.. i'm gettin ready to go talk to him & fall asleep on the phone.... like I did the past 2 nights.. oh yeah [[ he wants to pay my bills ]].... how nice does that sound???
xPce